Jessica Simpson has finally realised her childhood dream to become a major movie star. In, er… Russia. The actress’s latest film, inappropriately called Major Movie Star, last week managed to top the box office in Russia, despite not even being given a release date in the US or the UK – or indeed anywhere that has English as a first language. The film (a rip-off of the 1980 film Private Benjamin, in which a film star joins the army) has been sitting on the shelf for years and was even described by one participant as ‘one of the worst movies ever made’. But the Russians have lapped it up and distributors also expect it to be successful in Bulgaria, where it opens soon. This must be some consolation to Simpson, whose movie career to date has, to put it kindly, been a disaster. Her last starring role in 2007’s Blonde Ambition, was so bad that it was released into only eight cinemas in Simpson’s native Texas. But even her home crowd were unimpressed – the film made less than £700 in total.