Assalam o Alaikum

jokes comp feb 2011 ki comp ke polling saath im here

itney maths jokes suney ke me ko hansi ke saath bhook lagiing ab

tu janaab kis ne sab se zyada hasaya

tu janaab vote karein na..

Rules:

Last date of cast ur vote28 Feb 2011

Be Sincere mathematicians

Entries:

fasco_buk

Math Teacher :If a=b and b=c then a=c, now give me the practical example of this principle from real life.

Student :I love you sir and you love your daughter which means I love your daughter.

naz

what is 1 + 4 + 3 ?

i love u

no

i like u

no

i miss u

no

1 + 4 + 3 Means

1 + 4 + 3 = 8

maths per dehan do

Romance per nahi.

sadaf

Teacher: "Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?"

Student: "It's 42!"

Teacher: "Very good! - And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?"

Same student: "It's 24!"

0.o.Ashi.o.0

Please review this Mathematical Soultion showing how Women are all evil.

Mathematical Solution:

First, we state that women require time and money:

Women = time * money

...and as we all know, "time is money":

Time = Money

...and therefore:

Women = Money * Money = (Money)^2

...and because "Money is the root of all evil":

Money = sqrt(evil)

...therefore:

Women = (sqrt[evil])^2

...and we are forced to conclude that:

Women = Evil

Picture Provided for a easy picture solution:

Killer

An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island.

when a can of food rolls ashore. The chemist and the physicist comes up with many ingenious ways to open the can.

Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea:

"Assume we have a can opener ..."

Al0ne Stranger

One daya mathematician decides that he is sick of math.So, he walks down to the fire department and announces thathe wants to become a fireman.The fire chief says,“Well, you look like a good guy. I’d be glad to hire you, but first I have to give you a little test.”

The fire chief takes the mathematician to the alley behind the fire department which contains a dumpster, a spigot, and a hose. The chief then says,“OK, you’re walking in the alley and you see the dumpster here is on fire. What do you do?”

The mathematician replies,“Well, I hook up the hose to the spigot, turn the water on, and put out the fire.”

The chief says,“That’s great… perfect. Now I have to ask you just one more question. What do you do if you’re walking down the alley and you see the dumpster is not on fire?”

The mathematician puzzles over the question for a while and he finally says,“I light the dumpster on fire.”

The chief yells,“What? That’s horrible! Why would you light the dumpster on fire?”

The mathematician replies,“Well, that way I reduce the problem to one I’ve already solved.”

Royal

Applied Mathematics

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The population of this country is 237 million.

104 million are retired.

That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school,

which leave 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.

This leaves 19 million to do the work.

4 million are in the Armed Forces,

which leaves 15 million to do the work.

Take from the total the 14.8 million people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work.

There are 188,000 in hospitals,

so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 11,998 people in Prisons.

That leaves Just two people to do the work.

You and me.

And you're just sitting there reading jokes all day!

Igni

If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left ?

I don't know.

Why not ?

In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.

anaa

7 and 7 is 11

A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper.

"14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady.

"14 cents! For what?" asked the lady.

The storekeeper explained: The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents."

"I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11."

"What are your saying?"

"As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11...I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11!

Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."

zubeguri

A little boy was doin his maths homework, saying to himself. 2+5 the son of +++++ is 7.....3+6 the son of +++++ is nine

his mother heared this and gasped "what r u doing?" little boy answered " m doing my math's homework mom"

"and that is how ur teacher taught u to do it??" asked mother

"yes"he answered

infuriated, the mother asked the teacher next day "r u teaching maths to children by saying 2+2 the son of +++++ is 4???

the teacher started laughing n answered "what i taught them was 2+2 THE SUM OF WHICH IS 4"

Sonii

Math's Teacher to student: sharam kero tum log math mai fail hotay ho main jab tumhari class mai tha to 100/100 number aatay thay mere

student: SIR ZAROOR AAP KO KOI ACHA TEACHER PERHATA HOGA

all the Best Mathematicians