Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much
would your father still have?
Ted: $10.
Teacher: You don''t know Maths.
Ted: You don''t know my father!

Mother: David, come here.
David: Yes, mum.
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother: I know that, but I''m going Hong Kong tomorrow so I''m scolding
you now.

Father: Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8
Father: So?
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8. On Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8.

If she can''t make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?

Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear.
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No, mine is undying love

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: 1 year older then me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born

Teacher: Simon, your composition on ''My Dog'' is exactly the same as
brother''s. Did you copy his?
Simon: No, teacher. It''s the same dog!

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you
Son: That''s why I say she''s no good!

Teacher: where were you born?
Student: Singapore , Sir.
Teacher: Which part?
Student: All of me, Sir.

Teacher: How come you do not comb your hair?
Ah Kow: No comb, Sir.
Teacher: Use your dad''s then.
Ah Kow: No hair, Sir.

A boy came home from school with his exam results.
''What did you get?'' asked his father.
''My marks are under water,'' said the boy.
''What do you mean ''under water''?''
'' They are all below ''C'' (sea) level!''